I found my camera! :D
The groom-to-be is Javanese and the bride-to-be is Timorese.
The tradition to be used is Timor tradition with a little bit touch of Javanese.
For your information, the process itself had begun since last year with a "Peminangan".
Unfortunately, I didn't attend this procession, so what I wrote in this post is what I saw during the procession in Kupang.
The groom-to-be is my husband's best friend. So we were included into the groom-to-be group.
The groom-to-be family has to prepared "Belis" to be given to the bride-to-be family.
The Belis consists of:
- Uang air susu: money given to the family as an exchange of raising the daughter from baby until now
- Uang AIUW (I forgot to ask how to write it) or Uang Kayu: money given to the family as a thank you for the family who help to organize the wedding
- Silver coins
- Toiletries
- Jenang
The groom-to-be group has to come to the bride-to-be's home at 5 PM. No more or less.
Someone from the bride-to-be family will welcome the group at the front door.
They said some greeting in Timor language and then the groom-to-be groups had to answer "Eeeee".
Then the groom-to-be groups were allowed to enter the house.
In the house,the bride-to-be group served the groom-to-be group with "Sirih-Pinang".
After that, they served "Air Hangat" alias hot tea.
The spoke person from the bride-to-be group will give an opening speech and asking about the "Penyelesaian Secara Adat" (traditional term of agreement) which has been agreed during the "Peminangan".
Until this time, no one from the groom-to-be group is allowed to speak.
The bride-to-be group will check the Belis brought up.
Three person have to check the Belis. One from the grandparent generation, one from the parent generation, and one from the bride-to-be generation.
If the contain of Belis match what have been agreed during the "Peminangan" then the spokeperson from the groom-to-be group will be allowed to talk.
If not, then the groom-to-be group have to go back and trying to fulfill the requirement.
The spoke person from the groom-to-be spoke about the gratitude of being welcomed by the bride-to-be family then the spoke person from the bride-to-be group replied the speech.
At this moment, the groom-to-be is welcomed as "anak-mantu" (son in law).
The bride-to-be group exchanged the Belis with two (2) sheets of fabric, one bag of rice and one pig (if the groom-to-be is Catholic or Christian, if moslem the pig could be swapped with a goat).
The next procession was "Searching the Bride".
The spoke person from the bride-to-be asked the groom-to-be to search the bride-to-be in the house.
During the process, a pantun was read by the spokeperson from the bride-to-be group:
Pelan-pelan, hati-hati.. (Slowly, be careful)
Jangan sampai tersandung (Don't slip away)
Itulah calon istrimu, jagalah dia kapan pun (That's your future wife, take care of her anytime)Why do they have this pantun? Since if the groom-to-be choose the wrong girl, his family will be punished with a fee. It could be a long negotiation again to discuss the punishment.
After the searching process was over, the procession was followed by prayer.
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| Javanese vs Timor |
For the mass, it was an usual Roman Catholic's wedding mass.
What is unique is the entrance procession and the sitting position. The entrance procession used Timor music and dancer to accompany the bride and the groom.
For the sitting position, usually it is only the bride and the groom whom sit at the front of the altar.
In Timor, the witnesses also sat beside them.
It is a symbol that the witnesses also have a responsibility to be patron of the bride and the groom.
For the reception, wedding reception in Timor used seating dinner system.
The guest are seated in several tables. On each table, drinks, ice and cakes were prepared.
Then the reception began with opening speech followed by wedding cake's cutting.
After that the guess were allowed to take the dinner (buffet system), the sequence was arranged by usher.
After the dinner, it's dancing time!
The first dance is polonaise.
I was surprised to know that the polonaise's song is "Potong Bebek Angsa".
Do you know about this song?
Potong bebek angsa, angsa di kuali (Cut the duck and the swan, put the swan in the wok)
Nona minta dansa, dansa empat kali (The lady is asking for a dance, and dance four times)
Sorong ke kiri, sorong ke kanan, (move to the left, move to the right)
lalalalalalala (lalalalalala)
It's a famous children song in Indonesia. And honestly, I always think that the lyric of this song is a quite sadistic even the melody is cheerful. That's why I'm surprised.
But it didn't stop the people to enjoy the polonaise.
After the polonaise, it's the time for traditional Timor dance, known as tebe-tebe.
People are standing in a circle formation, then they grab each other arm. The dancing is following some pattern for the feet's movement.
Actually it's a very interesting dance. (I have the video, and I'll update this post later).
They would dance all night long.
But for me, it's the time to go back to the hotel. :)
I would like to thank you Victor and Putri for the opportunity to watch their wedding's procession.
Hope both you will enjoy marriage life and God bless you :)
*disclaimer: if there is any correction regarding the Timor's custom, I would gladly accept any comment
